Friday, January 05, 2007


Funny Email

I got this in email today. I've seen it several times before, but I still find it funny.... My responses are after each set.

Graduate versus Experienced Nurses

A Graduate Nurse throws up when the patient does.
An experienced nurse calls housekeeping when a patient throws up [CHECK]

A Graduate Nurse wears so many pins on their name badge you can´t read it.
An experienced nurse doesn´t wear a name badge for liability reasons [Not applicable, due to our policies]

A Graduate Nurse charts too much. [Is there really such a thing as too much?]
An experienced nurse doesn´t chart enough.

A Graduate Nurse loves to run to codes.
An experienced nurse makes graduate nurses run to codes. [Still waiting on this one]

A Graduate Nurse wants everyone to know they are a nurse. [Still here]
An experienced nurse doesn´t want anyone to know they are a nurse.

A Graduate Nurse keeps detailed notes on a pad.
An experienced nurse writes on the back of their hand, paper scraps,napkins, etc. [I try to keep a pad, but when in a rush]

A Graduate Nurse will spend all day trying to reorient a patient.
An experienced nurse will chart the patient is disoriented and restrain them. [Restraints only if they are dangerous. Makes them too noisy otherwise]

A Graduate Nurse can hear a beeping I-med at 50 yards. [I can hear them, but tracking down which one is always the chore]
An experienced nurse can´t hear any alarms at any distance.

A Graduate Nurse loves to hear abnormal heart and breath sounds.
An experienced nurse doesn´t want to know about them unless the patient is symptomatic. [You'd be amazed what people walk around with and it doesn't even phase them...]

A Graduate Nurse spends 2 hours giving a patient a bath.
An experienced nurse lets the CNA give the patient a bath. [I personally hate giving baths. Another perk of working in an ER, we don't have the time for baths!]

A Graduate Nurse thinks people respect nurses.
An experienced nurse knows everybody blames everything on the nurse. [One day on the floor, and you know this one]

A Graduate Nurse looks for blood on a bandage hoping they will get to change it.
An experienced nurse knows a little blood never hurt anybody. [You should see it when I have to start an IV.......]

A Graduate Nurse looks for a chance "to work with the family."
An experienced nurse avoids the family. [Families are usually worse than the patients...]

A Graduate Nurse expects meds and supplies to be delivered on time.
An experienced nurse expects them to never be delivered at all. [I expect to get my orders, right before the patient is discharged/admitted]

A Graduate Nurse will spend days bladder training an incontinent patient.
An experienced nurse will insert a Foley catheter. [Foleys are a nurses best friend]

A Graduate Nurse always answers their phone.
An experienced nurse checks their caller ID before answering the phone. [Had this one before I became a nurse]

A Graduate Nurse thinks psych patients are interesting.
An experienced nurse thinks psych patients are crazy. [They can be interesting, in someone else's section]

A Graduate Nurse carries reference books in their bag.
An experienced nurse carries magazines, lunch, and some "cough syrup" in their bag. [I carried reference books for all of a day. Now if it isn't on my PDA, I don't need to know it]

A Graduate Nurse doesn´t find this funny.
An experienced nurse does. [I find this hysterical]


Based on this test, I guess I am well on my way to being an experienced nurse........

Well, blow me over. 3 posts in 2 days. Amazing.
Just wanted to add, when the deliveries do come, they're not what you ordered. I speak from bitter experience, having ordered 100 cleaning cloths, and received 100,000.
If you're lucky enough to wear hospital issue scrubs at work, you never need paper. The pant leg will suffice!
Very informative and helpful. I was searching for this information but there are very limited resources. Thank you for providing this information

Graduate Dissertation Proposal
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